To my dear sweet children, I can’t express how your presence in my life has brought me such joy, laughter and an appreciation for the little things. Motherhood has been one of the hardest things I have ever had to do but it has also been the most rewarding. On days when I feel like I am failing, and wondering if I am good enough for you, you amaze me with your sincerity, your love for me and your complete trust in me.
There are days I still worry if medical school is the right thing for us as a family. Your daddy continually reminds me that this is an adventure we face as a family and not something that I am doing alone. I am choosing to pursue medical school because I feel that I have something to offer those around me by healing their sicknesses, being a listening ear, and being a source of counsel and comfort. It is not unlike being a mother, but on a much larger scale. My darlings, I want you to follow your passion and your dreams. It won’t be easy but it will be worth the effort and determination you put in.
When I see the comfortable life we have now, with the farm next door where you go feed the animals and follow our neighbor around as he plants and harvests, when I see how much you are blooming in your various social circles, I sometimes worry about disrupting this to go pursue medical school. But I want you to know that I am hoping my choice will ultimately be the best for you and will inspire you to be the best you can be despite the sacrifices you may have to make along the way. This journey to medical school has sometimes been a source of conflict in my heart as I feel pulled back and forth towards motherhood but as my wise mom told me just this morning, “Your kids will always know that you love them and that what you are doing is for them”.